God's watercolors

This week marks the 6th anniversary of my cousin's death. A motorcycle crash thousands of miles from family. He gave the toast at our rehearsal dinner; three weeks later, I gave his eulogy. Tragic.

His absence is still strange. I don't know. Do you ever get used to absence? And all my attempts to explain his death as part of God's good plan make God seem petty. I trust the good plan, but I do not understand it.

The hardest part: the girls never meeting Uncle Daniel.

I mentioned feeling glum recently, and this anniversary is part of it. But in his faithfulness, God gave this:

Without premeditation, I blurt out, Look girls - God's watercolors.

God's watercolors. Daniel's boyhood understanding of a sunset. His daily reminder of our beautiful creative God. Every time the setting sun burst through clouds, he saw the art.

This is how the girls will know Uncle Daniel. Through what I remember and pass on. Not just stories, but a point of view. Seeing God in skies and thunder.